Everybody needs a gang of 5.
Who are the 5 people you spend the most time with?
To really be successful you must surround yourself with successful people who want you to win.
This is hard for most people. You will need to cull your friends & family.
If your friends are negative, depressing, broke or unhelpful, cut them off.
If they don’t believe in your dreams, cut them off.
If they try to pull you down, cut them off.
If you’re a guy and want to approach women and your male friends won’t or can’t do it, cut them off.
If you’ve stopped drinking alcohol and others are drinking around you, don’t go out with them.
If your family is negative or depressing, don’t hang around them.
With all these people the best rule is “love them from a distance.” Minimize contact & influence.
This is especially true the bigger the leap you’re trying to make.
If you’re already part of the 1% and you want to join the 0.5% it may not be that difficult.
If you’re in the bottom 10% of income in the U.S. ($10,500) and you want to go to the top 1% ($250,000+) you will need to love a lot more people from a much bigger distance. This is because your friends don’t want you to change.
Imagine you are an amalgamation of the 5 people you spend the most time around. Imagine it because it’s actually true. Consider carefully who you want to be.
If you want to be wealthy, you need wealthy friends.
If you want to be good with women, you need friends who are good with women.
Here are two ways to think about the sort of people you need in your life.
There are others, but this is enough for you to get started looking for people without getting overwhelmed.
Most people will fit into one of the following 5 categories.
They believe in you 100% no matter what. They say: “You can do it. Go for it.“
Sounding boards. They listen well, without giving advice. They say: “I understand.”
Role models. Proof that success is possible. They say: “You can do it, too; let me show you how.” They give you advice you can trust because they’ve done what you want to do. (By the way, don’t listen to anyone who hasn’t done what you want to do already.)
Deliver valuable information. A referral, a job lead, an idea, or something else that provides forward momentum. Often your best messengers are your weakest ties. They say: “I can help.”
Naysayers / Haters
These people are full of fear & unrealized potential. They say: “You’ll never make it,” or even just “Be careful.” Probably 90% of the people in your life as you start out. Aim to reduce this to < 5% in the next 30 days, faster if possible. You only get one shot at this life (as far as we know) and you deserve not to be pulled down by this constant negativity. Use these people as fuel.
Make 5 columns on a sheet of paper, and write names of people you know down in each of the categories.
Look at the lists. Which list is longest? Which list is shortest? What does that tell you?
Are there any names you’d like to add? Which section do you want to make longer?
How do the haters affect you? Are you using them as rocket fuel for your ambition? What would you like to do about them?
What is one action you could do that would add more names to this list, in the categories you want, this week?
You need the following 5 types (ok if one person is more than one type)
Someone from a different cultural / ethnic background / raised in a different country
Someone from a different political / religious belief system who can argue without breaking the relationship
Someone much wealthier than you
Someone who works much harder than you
Someone who’s had a harder go of it in life than you
(Thanks to @WallStreetPlayBoy for this list)